watch me.


this is my motto.

10 things I learned this weekend...

1. I love living alone.
2. Taking a sleepy pill at 9 on a Friday night WILL result in the full nights sleep you neded!
3. Sexy photoshoots are heaps of fun.
4. Ripping up a feather pillow makes for beautiful photos and and seemingly uncleanable mess.
5. Kids birthday parties are absolutely bananas. Order=impossible.
6. When you're broke and need groceries, winco is worth the drive.
7. Life is short and anything can happen at any moment. Live fully.
8. I must keep momentum or I fall into a slump.
9. I get ver excited when I think of the future now.
10. Starting Dexter over from season one with someone new is just as fun as the first time. Ice truck killer!
What did you learn this weekend?

oh hi friday...


...its good to see you.
i have lots of fun things to look forward to this weekend.
& lots of prep before the fun whisks me away.
i hope you all have a wonderful weekend.



Hello dolls.
I am gathering for an upcoming project and just wanted to hear from all of you.
If you could ask everyone one question what would it be?
Or what is the one thing you would want to hear about from them?
I would love any and all input.
Thanks dears.

Me. Entirely me.

the life you have led...

Juliette & Hayden


This weekend I went down to eugene and did a photoshoot for one of my dear friends Juliette and her daughter Hayden. I have shot Hayden before but I was very excited to photograph the two of them together. They are both so beautiful and have such a light to them. I have been wanting to share more about my photography so here goes. Here are just a few images from the shoot. I love them all but the first ones are my favorite from the day.

I'd love to know what you think. 
Any favorites?

Later Gator...

On my way down to Eugene this weekend, I received this text from an unknown number.
The green are my responses. 
I thought this was hilarious and thus blog worthy...

There were a couple of times this weekend that I caught myself wondering about The Gator...
Who was he?
Or was he a she?
How and where did they meet Tad?
How and where did they gain the title The Gator?
Does Tad feel super rad about knowing someone called The Gator?
& lastly,
 did The Gator appreciate the time I took to compliment his texting skills or at least my wit?

Thanks Gator for providing me the comic relief I needed to get me from Portland to Eugene.

Post crossing // awesomness


(all my cards and then my favorite ones i sent)

Hey guys! I hope you are having a spectacular weekend!
I just popped down to Eugene for the weekend but thought I would stop in and let you all know about one of the coolest things ever!
A few weeks ago I came across this website called Postcrossing! It is a site that hooks you up with people from all over the world through post cards. What? How does it work you ask? Well, after you sign up you are given your first address. You can look at the persons profile and learn a little bit about them and then you send them a postcard. Once the recieve it the enter the card ID you have written on it and then it shows up on your map as one of the places you have sent to. You can have up to five cards out traveling at a time. And once your first card is entered into the system, your address is then sent to some one and you start receiving cards. You can costomize where you want to send to or receive from. And if you want to swap back and forth with the same person at all. It really is a cool and fun concept, and did i mention FREE to join. I just sent out my first batch of cards and cant wait for every one to get my little hellos. I sent one to China, Germany, two to Russia and one to the east coast here in the US. How cool!
I am so excited to get my first one and start my new collection!
Go check it out!

To my sweet, sweet followers...


I just wanted to say just how much you all mean to me. Just knowing you are there keeps me writing. But then, all of the wonderful feedback so many of you take the time to share, that is what keeps me here pouring my heart out time and again. My blog has become the most amazing source and outlet. It has been a bit of a shoulder, a friend even. Corny, I know, but so many of you have inspired me and showed me your hearts and I feel so blessed. I read every single comment and email. From the quickest hello to the long heartfelt messages.

But most of all it is the knowledge that what I am sharing and putting out there is actually helping. Some days I get messages saying that a particular quote is just the thing they needed to get through the day. Which is usually the reason I post them too. Timing is a funny and powerful thing.

And then there are days like today when I hear a story that makes me think, awww, it really is all worth it. Today, a good friend and follower told me that after she read one of my recent posts (you all know the one, the big break up post) and she decided to send the link to her cousin. Apparently her cousin has been struggling with the decision to finally get out of a relationship that just wasn't best for her. She had a hard time because she truly and deeply cared about this boy but knew it wasn't the right thing for her. After reading my post, something clicked and gave her the confidence in her decision to end things. I don't know any more than that and while I am not happy about a relationship ending, I am thoroughly grateful that my experience was able to help some one else choose what was best for them. I have no idea what part of my writing sang to her but I am glad it did. It is stories like these that help be push that publish button after opening my heart and crying over a keyboard. Each time I wonder less about what everyone will think. I slowly stop wondering what the people I know will say and start wondering how many people I don't know will end up relating or benifiting from my small feat. The feat of sharing my life, in it's entirety, with others. With everyone.

This is why I keep writing. This is why I post the good and the bad, the inspiring and the defeating. Because somedays I am here to bring you up, and others, you are here to bring me up. I truly appreciate all of you. While I write for me, I keep writing because of you.



Hey babes! Just a quick question for all of many of you life in portland? I would like to know for an upcoming project. So if you could just take a quick second to comment if you do, or even if you are close, it would be GREATLY appreciated! Thanks so much dears.

Wednesday's wisdom...

She couldnt have said it any better.

The break up post.


Ok. Here goes. I'm just gonna get this out there. Rip the bandaid, ya know?

As many of you have guessed, by either my recent inspirations or the lack of his title lately, the boyfriend and I have broken up. After a year and a half, we decided that where we were heading and the way we were getting there was just not the best for either of us. For whatever reasons my best friend and I started growing apart and were no longer acting as the great allies that we once were for each other. While we both wish it could have gone the other way I know that deep down we both agree that this is the best thing for us at this point in our lives.

My heart is heavy. I'm losing a best friend. The person i have turned to first every day for the last year and a half. The person that has taken better care of me than anyone else. The person that could make me laugh at the first sign of sadness. The person that took my breathe away and made me feel more loved than I have ever felt before. The person that has been by my side, constantly, consistenly. That's the hardest part. The selfish part. I'm sad for everything I am losing.

My head is going crazy. Mostly for everything I'm giving up. I'm giving up a future of knowing that someone would ALWAYS be there for me. I'm giving up the person I know in my heart will be the most amazing and selfless life partner and father. I'm giving up my biggest supporter. There have been moments I feel insane for willingly giving up this person. He is truly amazing.

Lastly, and luckily, my head and my heart are hopeful. I am hopeful that while I am losing and giving up all of these things, that I am also gaining many things. I am gaining some much needed independence. I am gaining strength through all of the heartache and pain and standing up for what I need. I am gaining peace, where anxiety and tension had temporarily moved in during those last months. But most of my hope still lies with him. I hope he will be ok. I hope he is gaining everything I am and more. I hope he heals and finds a better and more deserving counterpart. I hope he gets everything he wants and needs. And still, I hope he will be my friend again. Someday.

the end.

my little creation to get me through the week...

10 things I learned this weekend...


1. The Presidents Photographer is a very interesting and amazing documentary.
2. Sleeping in is one of lifes little pleasures.
3. Five Guys is quickly becoming my favorite place to eat!
4. Country Strong is an interesting movie but in the end I give it a thumbs up.
5. The guy from country song is hot as shit and could sing to me like that forever if he'd like.
6. Ikea is finally getting some NEW stuff in there.
7. Im pretty sure I have the best girlfriends in the world.
8. Dexter is NOT the most naughty puppy at the park.
9. Moving on is not fun.
10. Birthday cake flavored ice cream is so good it hurts.

What did you learn this weekend?

Ladies and Gentlemen...

1.13.2011 best friend & I

Thoughts on a Thursday...

"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. 
You get a second chance, every second." 

"Success means having the courage,
 the determination,
 and the will to become the person you believe you were meant to be."
- George Sheehan 

my kind of inspiration...


I have sort of left my photography out of the spotlight on this blog. I have a photo blog but have been waiting to launch in along side my website. I have been wanting to share my passion for photography more and more lately and I simply cant wait any longer. It is part of me, it is my art, my air, the way I see and speak life. Here are some of my favorite photos from one of my favorite photographers Rodney Smith. He is so unique and brings such beauty to his imagery. Please enjoy some inspiration.

pure beauty.

Tonight I love...


these braids...

& these ruffles...

le sigh...

Change the world...

lets get wet

I really do love my bathroom. 
It is so cute with a rain shower and and amazingly deep tub. 
But THESE, are to die for.

10 things I learned this weekend...


1. Girls night in is turning out to be my favorite weekend activity.
2. Gravy is my favorite breakfast spot in Portland! Get the french toast!
3. I can give a pretty decent hair cut. Who wants one?
4. It is actually possible for me to lose weight!
5. Last minute visits from one of my best guy friends is the best way to perk up a weekend.
6. Tube is the best place ever on Hip Hop nights!
7. Puppy makes the best cuddle buddy ever. I couldnt live with out him
8. Debt sucks. (happy now mother?)
9. Falling asleep to Inception will result in very crazy dreams. Can you say zombie crime spree?
10. Standing under my rain shower can actually wash away stress. 

My monday...


She believed...

Friend Win.


I win.
I have the best friend that goes outside of the bar she is at, in the cold, for 20 minutes to be on the phone because even though you say you dont she knows you need to talk. 
I win.
Love you chelle.

*plus she lets me take beautiful photos like this of her even though she hates it.

My life, today.


[par-uh-shoot] noun, verb, -chut·ed, -chut·ing.
a folding, umbrellalike, fabric device for allowing a person, to float down safely through the air from a great height.

“But it’s hard to stay mad when there’s so much beauty in the world. Sometimes I feel like I’m seeing it all at once and it’s too much. My heart fills up like a balloon that’s about to burst. And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can’t feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life.” — American Beauty