1. I have the most amazing family I could hope for.
2. Its the little things that mean the most.
3. I am more appreciative (and impressed) of the thoughtfulness behind the gifts I was given.
4. This year absolutely flew by.
5. Im getting anxious about the future.
6. I am lucky and loved.
7. Its getting harder to keep good and meaningful friendships going.
8. Im tired of not feeling health.
9. Im still the one that organizes all of the plans. :)
10. I absolutely adore the holidays, I honestly didnt know just how much until this year.

What did you learn?

Awesome Day 10: Market, Moving, Mo!

This wonderful Sunday was full of amazing mini awesomes. Here goes...

I woke up with a happy hangover. An awesome hangover. No, literally, a hangover from so much awesome. I felt wonderful. I woke up the rest of the clan out in the living room and we spent a while just laughing as we recapped and helped each other fill in the blanks of the nights festivities. Not to mention looked at all of the pictures we both, remembered, and didnt remember taking. Then we all took the chilly stroll to the Saturday Market (that goes all weekend) down by the waterfront and looked around and had some "breakfast." It was awesome, cold, but awesome.

After I said by to my friends, it was time to go help the boyfriend move out of his apartment and into his new house with some different friends of his. It is a good move for him right now and I was glad he was doing it. However, I was not glad I was helping. I was so tired and cold and cranky. Blah! But I did the girlfriendy thing and lent him my jeep and my massive muscle in which I know he couldnt have done it without. It was both fun and awful all at the same time.

Later, was the best awesome. I stopped by Mo's Birthday Party! I cant believe my little buddy is 2! So crazy! I have missed him so much. I still hadnt seen him since my last day with him. I really have wanted to but it was a bit of an odd situation and it was just easier, or so I thought then, to just let it be for a while. But when I walked into that house and saw his long shaggy hair and his deeper voice, I had thoroughly regretted staying away at all! He hugged me and still called me Ya-Ya, I loved that! He showed me all his stuff and played with me the whole time. This was a big deal as I was afraid he might have forgotten me or atleast forgotten how much fun we have together. He hadnt and it was so awesome. I loved and hated it. It was fun and also sad to see how much he had changed in just a month and a half. As the party wound down Mo had hugged and thanked most everyone that was there and it was just me, Mo, the boyfriend, Mos parents and one grandparent left. I began saying goodbye and asked for a hug, but Mo replied with a loud and steady, NO! He wouldnt give me a hug becuase he didnt want me to go. This broke my heart because I know I had done this to him. I did exactly what I didnt want to do to him. I left one day and didnt come back. I felt awful and cried a little bit. I finally got my goodbye but it was rought and tear filled. But I promised to come back this week to drop off the last thing I had for him and hang for a little visit. It was hard to see him like that, but it was totally awesome!!!

Letter to a Friend...

This is a 2 part post. Why? Because the second part sprouted from the first and instead to two seperate posts, I have decided to combine them.

A few months ago I had read a review about a new book called Rattled by Christine Coppa. For some reason I was drawn to it and a couple weeks ago I finally bought it. The story was true and began with a girl in her later twenties that finds out she is pregnant. Her boyfriend, who she hadnt been with for very long, was pretty quickly out of the picture, leaving her a single mother before her child had even arrived.

I cant actually put my finger on the reason I loved this book so much. She was not the best writer I have ever read, but there was something about the ease of her words that drew me in and cemented the cover to my palms. I simply could not put it down. Her story was inspirational. She grew up and made so many positive changes in the short 9 months while she prepared for her babys arrival.

Though their stories are very different, reading this book made me think of my best friend, Andi. The differences are great: Andi has an amazing fiance that was by her side the entire time, and I also feel that she was just naturally much more prepared for a child than this author. She has always been a mother, she just hadnt had her baby yet.

There were a few parts where the authors friends would come over bringing her care packages and having weekly get togethers through out her pregnancy. This struck a chord with me and I have not been able to let it go. I know that I stood by Andi through her pregnancy. I was after all the one with her in my tiny bathroom when the plus sign appeared. I was there for her enough, or so I thought at the time. These days I have changed my mind and this is why, today, I write to her.


My Dearest Andi,
I am so proud of you and the woman you have become, I can barely put it into words. During your pregnancy you kept a positive attitude and did your best at dismissing stresses all for the sake of your child. During your labor you had a strength in you that i truly didnt know existed. You fought so hard and did an amazing job. I am so grateful I got to be there and be a part of Bryce coming into this world. You were absolutely stunning. And over the last 10 months, I have watched you blossom into the most amazing mother. You are an inspiration and no one could ask you to do a better job than you are doing with your son.

Although I mean all of those things from the bottom of my heart, they are not the reason for this letter. My apology, however, is. I am sorry for not being there more for you. I know that we have always led different lives and since your having a baby, our lives couldnt get any further away from similar. I should have made more of an effort. During your pregnancy and after, I should have went out of my way and had at least a weekly dinner with you. You have never asked much out of our friendship and now having the time to look back and see a little bit of how hard and lonely it all could have been, I know I should have done more. There is no excuse for it, I should have made you a bigger priority. You didnt deserve it. You have always been there for me when I needed you in any way.

It is simply killing me now that I cannot go back and change this. Now that you and Bryce are a huge priority for me, but we live in different towns, I know how stupid it was for me to neglect our friendship when it was just an arms length from me. I am deeply sorry for not recognizing what exactly you have been going through. I hope you can accept my apology and notice the strides I am making to be sure something like this doesnt happen again. I love you and cannot wait for our next visit.

With love,
Lacey

Everything Happens For a Reason...

Well, I was right. Weird how that happens sometimes. In all of my experience with jobs, every time something had fizzled out, or in this case, had been completely stamped out, something better was waiting for me just around the corner. That is why it was pretty easy for me to keep a good perspective on all of this.

I had met a wonderful family on Sunday evening. We both just fell in love with each other. There was truly an instant comfort and friendship. I was so excited at the prospect of working with such adorable little children (7 month old girl and a 3 year old boy) and some of the greatest, most laid back and generous parents I have encountered. It all reminded me of my best job yet and the bond that I had created and still carry with the family. I was ecstatic!

So Wednesday, I went back over there for the second meeting for a few more questions and to meet the Grandma! It was great. And...I got hired! I got the job! I couldnt be more: grateful, happy, excited, appreciative, etc. It is an amazing position and opportunity. Great kids, with a great schedule, amazing bosses, tons of time off, and a situation that allows me to be a great nanny while pursuing the other passions in my life. I am blessed.

It all goes to show that everything happens for a reason. With change comes opportunity, and I am ready. I am so ready.